Well finally a new post, but unfortunately this is all about ME venting. For the past few days stress and frustration had me in a headlock and wouldn't let go. Everything seemed overwhelming and I just wanted to crawl somewhere and hide, but life will never let you do that, so you just go through the motions. I always prided myself as a sort of "Hakuna Matata" kind of guy, that was me...Mr. "No Worries", but circumstances not under my control has sent me in a tail spin. I know life is hard and I accept that, but it seems some people get everything they want, whenever they want it and they are usually not the most moral of people. I'm not saying I am a saint but I do know the difference between right and wrong. Anyway, what I'm getting at is...when will it be my turn to shine? I believe God has a path for us to travel, but com'on Big Guy can I get a breather between the problems? I know in my heart He watches over me and in time all will make sense, but feeling overwhelmed has taken a toll on me and the people I love. I am sorry if I sound whiny and most everyone has some problems that they are dealing with, but ya know it's my blog and I'll bitch if I want too! LOL
Now back to feelings. The turmoil I've been going through cannot be displayed here for legal reasons, but the frustrations and stresses remind me of the time when I was struggling with my sexuality. I hid myself for so long that guilt, stress, self loathing all swirled around inside me. I felt utterly alone. I was a disaster waiting to happen. I lied to my friends and family all to keep my secret. I was fortunate, when I finally came out, it was into the open arms of my friends and family I was so scared I would lose. I chose a wayward path, but He was by my side every step of the way until I become whole with myself. So I should just trust and wait, and not be so stressed...just follow and live, because everything will work out fine.
SECRETS
by
Thomas Ventrelli
How can I live with these secrets inside?
Why must it be, that I have to hide?
Will they understand these feelings in me?
Or should I live deceivingly?
Secrets are meant to be told, is this true?
But will they accept what I must do?
Do I cover-up, forget who I am?
Living in a prison of my scam.
Decisions and lies, I want to be free
Oh these secrets, secrets are killing me.
I am trapped by Society, she holds the key
Of who I am and who I appear to be
So many years of secrets, so hard to confess
Is my life a lie? Please don't say "yes"
I want to be true to myself and too you
Will you still love me? I pray you do
Please don't judge me with labels of different decor
Just love me for who I am...that's all I ask for.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Thursday, August 23, 2012
THE ARCHITECT OF TIME
Today's post is a collaboration between me and my good friend Lynn, who introduced me to blogging. She is an amateur photographer and her pictures are amazing. You can view her blog at...Lyroslens.blogspot.com. Well she sent me this beautiful pick she took in her backyard and asked me to write a poem about it. When the subject matter is this good, the words came easily.
THE ARCHITECT OF TIME
BY
THOMAS VENTRELLI
A SPIDER SPINS ITS WEB
SO INTRICATE AND FINE
WEAVING IN AND OUT
AN ARCHITECT OF TIME
IT IS WITH GREAT ENDEAVOR
THIS TINY THING CREATES
A SYMPHONY OF GEOMETRY
NATURE'S STATE OF GRACE
BUT WITH THE WINDS OF CHANGE
THE WORK FOREVER GONE
NATURE'S LITTLE ARCHITECT
BEGINS ANOTHER DAWN
TO WEAVE AND SPIN ANOTHER DAY
A BEAUTIFUL DESIGN
OH WHAT FRAILTY OF ITS WORLD
THE ENDLESS ARCHITECT OF TIME
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
THE APPETITE...A SHORT BEDTIME STORY.
THE APPETITE
by
Thomas Ventrelli
Once upon a time, in a big city like New York, there lived a young man named Melvin Shoemacker. Melvin was a timid, frail young man. He wore big black rimmed bifocal glasses that hugged his nose making his voice somewhat nasal. He was a smart young man, but lacked common sense. Melvin's life revolved around his job. He was punctual and never, ever took a day off. Work was his social life, since he didn't have any friends or family to cater to. But, something was missing in his life, companionship. He longed for someone to love, but was afraid. Although he wouldn't admit it to anyone, Melvin had an inferiority complex, and was terrified of rejection, mainly due to his High School days where he was known as Melvin the Nerd. Melvin wanted to be strong, built and handsome, but nothing seemed to work. He tried joining a gym, bulking up on proteins, but nothing seemed to affect his thin, wiry body. One time he went as far as sending away for a Charles Atlas body building kit, he saw in one of his favorite comic books, but like everything else, it didn't work. So Melvin accepted his situation and pushed aside his fantasy for companionship...until one day while reading a supermarket tabloid, he came across an ad....
Are you depressed, lonely, feeling down about yourself? Do you want to enjoy
life, become a whole new person? Ms. Lenora can help you! She will transform
you into the person you longed to be. Pay her a visit, what have you got to lose?
Most major credit cards excepted!
Well...you could probably guess what happened. Melvin was ecstatic. He was so happy he decided to take off the next day from work and go see Ms. Lenora. For some strange reason, he had a feeling she could help him and make him into the man he wanted to be.
Melvin looks down at the address he scribbled down last night. "This is it!", his inner voice exclaims staring at the old brownstone. He walks up the stairs and into the vestibule. Melvin scans the door bells and presses the middle button. After a few seconds, he is buzzed in. In the adjoining hallway a sign is posted which reads: MS LENORA'S HERBS AND POTIONS SHOP 2ND. FLOOR. Melvin hurries up the flight of stairs following arrows pointing the way. More arrows point to the end of the corridor, and without haste he moves quickly to the door. Ready to knock his fist poised, the door opens magically and standing before him is a woman dressed in black with green sparkling eyes. She has thick, black hair that flows down past her shoulder covering her huge bulging bosom. Melvin's glasses begin to fog as the woman beckons him inside. Melvin walks in wiping his glasses as the door closes behind him. "I am Lenora, how can I help you?" The woman replies. Melvin puts on his glasses and surveys the small shop. The shop is filled with books, and potions line the walls. To the far right is a desk with papers and talismans on it. Near the desk is a potted bare tree, its branches extending crookedly throughout the room. Melvin walks up to the tree and stares at the large black crow that is perched on the lower branch. "Err...what're ya starin' at?" The crow yacks. Surprised, Melvin stumbles backwards into the arms of Ms Lenora. He looks up and she smiles down at him.
"It talks..." mutters Melvin as he composes himself.
"No shit Sherlock!" Replies the crow. Ms Lenora gives the bird a menacing look, then focuses her attention on Melvin.
"Yes, unfortunately it does...but that's not what matters. How can I help you?"
"Well, uh...," Melvin begins, "I read your advertisement and uh...I wondered if you can help me. My name is Melvin Shoemacker...but first, ar-are you a-a- w-witch?" The woman in black begins to laugh and the crow joins in, soon Melvin is laughing nervously. Ms. Lenora shoots another glance at the crow, and the laughter stops except for Melvin.
"Why yes...," Lenora replies proudly, her green eyes wide and sparkling. Melvin swallows his laughter with a huge gulp. "No need to worry though..." she continues, "witches are a respectable lot."
"Errrr-respectable, respectable." The crow insists.
"Then you'll help me?" Melvin questions timidly.
"What is it that you want, my little friend?" asks Lenora.
"I-I want to be handsome and strong, you know...uh have muscles and a nice body. I hate myself, everyone thinks I'm a nerd. I want to go on dates, be desired by women..." exclaims Melvin.
"This can be done...but are you sure this is what you want? You seem like a fine young man to me, maybe all you need is some self confidence."
"No, no I'm sure...I want a new me!"
"If you are positive this is what you want, it can be done, but for a price."
"I'll pay you anything, if you can help me." Melvin replies excitedly.
"No, you misunderstand. I cannot put a price on matters such as this, it is up to you, Melvin. How much is this transformation worth to you?" Melvin ponders the question a while then blurts out, "I'll give all that I have to be changed. I have about $15,000 in savings, is that sufficient?"
"If that is its worth to you then it is the price. Come back tomorrow with the payment and we will begin."
"Oh thank you, thank you, Ms. Lenora." Melvin exclaims shaking her hand repeatedly.
"No need to be thankful...it is what you want Melvin, right?"
"Oh yes, yes!"
"Are you sure Melvin, think carefully, because once we begin the transformation there's no turning back...no refunds or exchanges."
"Oh I am sure. I want this more than anything in the world."
After Melvin left the brownstone he went directly to his bank and withdrew his money. He was living on cloud 9. For some strange reason he had faith in Ms Lenora. He knew deep in his heart that he would be cured of this disease called Nerdism. During the night, Melvin tossed and turned in his bed. He waited and wished for so long, that it was hard for him to sleep. The following day work was slow and tedious. He continuously watched the clock. He wanted to get out of there and head to Ms. Lenora's and begin his transformation. Finally five o'clock came and he grabbed his briefcase filled with money and raced to Ms. Lenora's brownstone.
"Melvin, before we begin...are you absolutely, positively sure this is what you want?"
"Ms. Lenora, I am. I need this and I want it with all my heart and soul. I am tired of being the man that I am. I've tried to change but nothing worked for me. Please help me."
"As you wish." Ms Lenora replies, as she walks over to a large shelf. She grabs a green bottle from the case and takes it to her desk. She pulls out the cork and drops a small yellow pellet into the bottle. Immediately the bottle begins to glow a bright green. Lenora stretches her arms out and begins to chant, "cora noctum ki dizar, ufum keena bellidar." Melvin watches in amazement as pale green smoke rises from the bottle. Soon the smoke dissipates and the glowing subsides. Ms Lenora replaces the cork and waves Melvin over to the desk.
"Melvin, this is a potent potion, take one teaspoon every morning after breakfast and soon you will be the person you've always dreamed of being." Lenora replies handing the bottle to Melvin.
"That's it?...Uh that's all I have to do?" Asks Melvin looking at the bottle.
"That is all...but there are a few rules you must follow while taking this potion."
"What rules? What do you mean?"
"First the potion must be taken in the morning..."
"Errr..take it in the morning...morning..." The crow sings.
"Secondly, you must take it after you eat breakfast..."
"Errr...in the morning after you eat..." Echoes the crow.
"And finally the most important rule of them all, never ever under any circumstances should you take more than the dosage I prescribed."
"Errr...take it in the morning after you eat, but only a teaspoon so don't you cheat." Rhymes the crow.
"Do you understand Melvin? Follow these simple rules and soon you will be a brand new Melvin Shoemacker."
"Let me get this straight, I must take the potion in the morning after breakfast, but only a teaspoon, no more...no less."
"That is correct."
"Sounds easy, are you sure it will work?" Melvin asks questioningly.
"Oh yes...it definitely will." Ms.Lenora replies a huge smile on her face.
A week passed, and then two; Melvin took his potion faithfully, but still no physical change. However, since he's been taking the potion he has felt better and better each day. On Monday morning of the third week, Melvin got up from bed and yawned his way into the bathroom. He looked into the mirror and almost passed out. He smiled and began to dance around. It was working. He posed in front of the mirror and noticed muscles forming on his arms and stomach. He took off his black rimmed glasses and studied his face. He looked handsome, his face was clear and fuller; more importantly, his eyesight seemed corrected. He didn't need those ugly glasses anymore. He threw the glasses to the floor and laughed. Each passing day Melvin noticed subtle changes, all for the better. He went shopping and bought new clothes and treated himself to a new haircut. As the days rolled on, the changes became more evident; like a withered balloon pumped with air, Melvin filled out and was no longer a skinny nerd. The women of the office took notice and would flock around his desk hoping for a date. Melvin just smiled and teased them, except for Cindy. He always had a thing for Cindy, back when he was a nerd, but he never acted on his feelings. Cindy was always friendly towards him, but lately she stayed away and paid him no mind. He really liked her, but couldn't understand her cold shoulder so he decided to confront her. "Cindy, I was just wondering if you had a minute to talk."
"I'm pretty busy Melvin..." She replied.
"It will only take a second..."
"Okay just a second. I have a lot of work to do."
"Cindy I don't understand, what's your problem?"
"Excuse me Melvin, I don't have a problem, you do!"
"What do you mean?" Melvin answered puzzled.
"Ah forget it Melvin, just leave me alone."
"Cindy, I've always liked you..."
"That's the problem! I've always liked you too, before you changed. I remember when you were the sweetest, kindest man. Now you're just another conceited muscle brain. Where did the Melvin I know go?"
Melvin wanted to cry, he always had a thing for Cindy but he kept it to himself. If he had only known...but suddenly his pride took over and became angry. "Let me tell you Cindy, the old Melvin was a weak lonely man." Cindy just looked up at him with tears in his eyes and answered, "No you're wrong, now all I see is a lonely weak man." Cindy turned away from him and stormed off to her office. Melvin stood paralyzed and for a split second he felt like his old self, a nobody, a weak frail man, but the feeling quickly vanished when Donna sauntered up to him and invited him for dinner.
Melvin stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. He smiled at himself and admired his body. Thoughts of Cindy crept into his mind, but he quickly dismissed them and focused on his date with Donna. Donna was a pretty woman and even though she was known as the office tramp, it didn't bother him. He was about to get lucky and that was all that mattered. He excitedly dressed knowing it was going to be a terrific night.
Melvin picked Donna up and he could see she wasn't wearing a bra. He kissed her as she entered his car and gave her a rose he picked up at a street vendor. She smelled the flower and giggled.
"So where do you want to eat?" Asked Melvin.
"I don't care Mel..." She giggled again.
"I thought dinner would be nice, aren't you hungry?"
"I'm only hungry for one thing right now..." She whispered nibbling on his ear. Needless to say they decided to skip dinner and head to Melvin's place; neither was disappointed by this arrangement.
The sun glistened through the window and engulfed the sleeping couple. Articles of clothing were strewn about the room in excited disarray. Melvin restlessly awoke by the blinding sun. He looked at his alarm clock and jumped out of bed.
"Jesus Christ it's nine o'clock! Donna get up!" Melvin shook the woman in his bed and she yawned. "Donna we have to move, it's nine...I can't afford to take another day off!"
"Arghhh...let me sleep, please." She yawned turning over on her side.
"Do what you want, I've got to go." Melvin quickly showered and got dressed as Donna lay sleeping in his bed. He glanced at her with regret and grabbed his coat and headed for the door. Suddenly he remembered the potion. He grabbed the bottle and downed the remaining liquid. As Melvin walked out of his apartment he remembered Ms. Lenora's rules..."First it must be taken in the morning, second it must be taken after breakfast, and most importantly only the prescribed dosage, no more no less." As Melvin raced to work he thought to himself, "Well I got one right...what could possibly happen?"
The convulsions started immediately after he had his lunch. After he finished his Big Mac and fries his body began to jerk and twist uncontrollably. He made it back to his office and ran into the bathroom. He looked into the mirror and his face was beet red and his body tingled all over. He splashed water on his face and stared in the mirror. "Oh God, I feel like shit, what was in that damn burger." Suddenly a sharp pain pierced his abdomen. Melvin fell to the floor holding his stomach. As he convulsed on the bathroom floor, he let out a huge belch, slowly the pain subsided. Melvin grabbed onto the sink and hoisted himself up. Sweat poured down his face, but there was no more pain. Slowly he straightened himself out and looked back into the mirror. He was flushed and still queasy, but he managed to pull himself together. He stepped out of the bathroom and almost ran into Cindy. "Hey watch it...Melvin are you feeling okay?" Asked Cindy.
"Yeah I'm okay...just think I had a bad burger. Cindy look I'm..."
"Well excuse me, I have work to do." She said as concern was replaced by indifference on her face.
Melvin just stood there, as the woman who meant a great deal to him walked away.
The afternoon seemed to drag on forever. Melvin kept watching the clock praying for it to move faster. Finally work was over and he packed up his things and left. As he stood outside his apartment door, he remembered Donna and hoped he let herself out and was not still in there. He called her name as he walked into the apartment, but there was no answer. He went directly to his bedroom and found a note on his bed:
MELVIN-LAST NIGHT WAS AMAZING! CALL ME,
DONNA
Melvin laughed and crumpled the paper and threw it in the garbage. He walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. He grabbed a beer and noticed the left-over chicken from the other night. He took a leg and sat in his recliner and switched on the television. He devoured the leg in seconds and downed the beer. His stomach rumbled and gurgled calling for more food. He didn't want to give in to his hunger, not sure if his stomach was still queasy, but it growled wanting more food. He opened the refrigerator and took out the rest of the left-over chicken, within minutes the plate was empty. He opened a box of cookies and ate them in one sitting along with a quart of milk, but still his hunger couldn't be quenched. He tried to stop eating but couldn't. He ate and ate, anything and everything; but still he couldn't control his appetite. Suddenly he felt his body expand, his pants tightened and he popped the buttons on his shirt. He was a man obsessed, all that mattered to him was what he was going to eat next. He called for pizza, then Chinese food, hour after hour he sat and ate. The nights came and went, but Melvin did not sleep. He continued to devour every edible thing that was in his house, and when there was nothing left he called for more take out. No thoughts but food entered his mind. The phone rang, but he could not answer it he was too busy feeding his face.
Cindy put down the phone. She was worried about Melvin, he didn't look good four days ago and he hasn't been back to work since. She hoped he was alright, because she had a strange feeling something was wrong. She pushed the thought out of her head, deciding he was using his vacation time and having fun. She always liked Melvin, but then he changed. She wishes the old Melvin would resurface, then she would go out with him, but she new it would never happen. He turned into a conceited, arrogant muscle monster, and she cannot stomach that type of man.
ONE WEEK LATER
Cindy walked slowly up the staircase. A strange odor filled the hallway. She stopped on the first landing and walked to the door. She knocked and called out but there was no answer. She turned the knob and the door clicked open. She took a deep breathe and pushed the door open. A wave of odors crashed against her, she gagged and thought she would vomit, but she held it down. Garbage was everywhere, mounds of pizza boxes, wrappers and food cartons, littered the tiny apartment. "Hello?...Melvin are you here?" She called out holding her nose. She pushed through the garbage , then stopped in her tracks. A weird rustling noise came from behind the door to the right. She walked to the door, stopped and listened. A grotesque squishing noise came from within the room. She opened the door and slowly walked in. The room was dark, her eyes followed where the noise was coming from and she thought she saw something moving in the back of the room. She moved her hand up to the wall in search of a light switch; with the light came her screams. Cindy screamed again at the mass of blubber and flesh that sat in a corner chomping on what appeared to be a human leg. A headless torso laid at the things feet, a Domino's Pizza cap sat nearby. The thing that was Melvin looked up at Cindy, it tossed the leg to the floor and extended its grubby arms and sausage like fingers towards her. Suddenly it began to shake like a bowl of jello, and began its gelatinous way towards Cindy. She screamed again as it rippled and wriggled its way across the floor. She screamed again, but it didn't stop. It sloshed and slid across the floor leaving a trail of greasy lard behind it. Cindy turned to run but tripped over all the garbage. It inched its way closer and closer, Cindy pushed her self against the wall, paralyzed with fear. The mass of greasy blubber came at her inching itself like a huge slug. Suddenly it stopped. Its huge eyes bulged and its mouth dropped. She looked up at the creature and for an instant it looked familiar. "Oh Melvin please." She cried staring into the things eyes. The things mouth opened wider and it slid closer. "Please Melvin...I...I loved you." Cindy cried. The creature rumbled and shook like a jello mold in an earthquake. The layers of fat rippled and bounced. A low deep moan came from the creature as it vibrated and convulsed. Cindy stood and inched her way to the door. The moan grew louder as the thing shook uncontrollably. Cindy placed her hand over her ears as she watched the creature in horror. The thing that was Melvin blurted out the woman's name in a deep, hoarse moan. At that moment the convulsions stopped, and the creature exploded. Blubber and flesh flew in every direction, sticking to the walls and ceiling. Cindy screamed uncontrollably. as blood spurted from the remaining lump of lifeless flesh. She ran out of the apartment hysterical, knowing she would never see Melvin again.
There is a moral to this story, but I think you can figure it out for yourself. Now go to sleep my friends and be good, cause if your not....(Insert evil laugh)
THE END
by
Thomas Ventrelli
Once upon a time, in a big city like New York, there lived a young man named Melvin Shoemacker. Melvin was a timid, frail young man. He wore big black rimmed bifocal glasses that hugged his nose making his voice somewhat nasal. He was a smart young man, but lacked common sense. Melvin's life revolved around his job. He was punctual and never, ever took a day off. Work was his social life, since he didn't have any friends or family to cater to. But, something was missing in his life, companionship. He longed for someone to love, but was afraid. Although he wouldn't admit it to anyone, Melvin had an inferiority complex, and was terrified of rejection, mainly due to his High School days where he was known as Melvin the Nerd. Melvin wanted to be strong, built and handsome, but nothing seemed to work. He tried joining a gym, bulking up on proteins, but nothing seemed to affect his thin, wiry body. One time he went as far as sending away for a Charles Atlas body building kit, he saw in one of his favorite comic books, but like everything else, it didn't work. So Melvin accepted his situation and pushed aside his fantasy for companionship...until one day while reading a supermarket tabloid, he came across an ad....
Are you depressed, lonely, feeling down about yourself? Do you want to enjoy
life, become a whole new person? Ms. Lenora can help you! She will transform
you into the person you longed to be. Pay her a visit, what have you got to lose?
Most major credit cards excepted!
Well...you could probably guess what happened. Melvin was ecstatic. He was so happy he decided to take off the next day from work and go see Ms. Lenora. For some strange reason, he had a feeling she could help him and make him into the man he wanted to be.
Melvin looks down at the address he scribbled down last night. "This is it!", his inner voice exclaims staring at the old brownstone. He walks up the stairs and into the vestibule. Melvin scans the door bells and presses the middle button. After a few seconds, he is buzzed in. In the adjoining hallway a sign is posted which reads: MS LENORA'S HERBS AND POTIONS SHOP 2ND. FLOOR. Melvin hurries up the flight of stairs following arrows pointing the way. More arrows point to the end of the corridor, and without haste he moves quickly to the door. Ready to knock his fist poised, the door opens magically and standing before him is a woman dressed in black with green sparkling eyes. She has thick, black hair that flows down past her shoulder covering her huge bulging bosom. Melvin's glasses begin to fog as the woman beckons him inside. Melvin walks in wiping his glasses as the door closes behind him. "I am Lenora, how can I help you?" The woman replies. Melvin puts on his glasses and surveys the small shop. The shop is filled with books, and potions line the walls. To the far right is a desk with papers and talismans on it. Near the desk is a potted bare tree, its branches extending crookedly throughout the room. Melvin walks up to the tree and stares at the large black crow that is perched on the lower branch. "Err...what're ya starin' at?" The crow yacks. Surprised, Melvin stumbles backwards into the arms of Ms Lenora. He looks up and she smiles down at him.
"It talks..." mutters Melvin as he composes himself.
"No shit Sherlock!" Replies the crow. Ms Lenora gives the bird a menacing look, then focuses her attention on Melvin.
"Yes, unfortunately it does...but that's not what matters. How can I help you?"
"Well, uh...," Melvin begins, "I read your advertisement and uh...I wondered if you can help me. My name is Melvin Shoemacker...but first, ar-are you a-a- w-witch?" The woman in black begins to laugh and the crow joins in, soon Melvin is laughing nervously. Ms. Lenora shoots another glance at the crow, and the laughter stops except for Melvin.
"Why yes...," Lenora replies proudly, her green eyes wide and sparkling. Melvin swallows his laughter with a huge gulp. "No need to worry though..." she continues, "witches are a respectable lot."
"Errrr-respectable, respectable." The crow insists.
"Then you'll help me?" Melvin questions timidly.
"What is it that you want, my little friend?" asks Lenora.
"I-I want to be handsome and strong, you know...uh have muscles and a nice body. I hate myself, everyone thinks I'm a nerd. I want to go on dates, be desired by women..." exclaims Melvin.
"This can be done...but are you sure this is what you want? You seem like a fine young man to me, maybe all you need is some self confidence."
"No, no I'm sure...I want a new me!"
"If you are positive this is what you want, it can be done, but for a price."
"I'll pay you anything, if you can help me." Melvin replies excitedly.
"No, you misunderstand. I cannot put a price on matters such as this, it is up to you, Melvin. How much is this transformation worth to you?" Melvin ponders the question a while then blurts out, "I'll give all that I have to be changed. I have about $15,000 in savings, is that sufficient?"
"If that is its worth to you then it is the price. Come back tomorrow with the payment and we will begin."
"Oh thank you, thank you, Ms. Lenora." Melvin exclaims shaking her hand repeatedly.
"No need to be thankful...it is what you want Melvin, right?"
"Oh yes, yes!"
"Are you sure Melvin, think carefully, because once we begin the transformation there's no turning back...no refunds or exchanges."
"Oh I am sure. I want this more than anything in the world."
After Melvin left the brownstone he went directly to his bank and withdrew his money. He was living on cloud 9. For some strange reason he had faith in Ms Lenora. He knew deep in his heart that he would be cured of this disease called Nerdism. During the night, Melvin tossed and turned in his bed. He waited and wished for so long, that it was hard for him to sleep. The following day work was slow and tedious. He continuously watched the clock. He wanted to get out of there and head to Ms. Lenora's and begin his transformation. Finally five o'clock came and he grabbed his briefcase filled with money and raced to Ms. Lenora's brownstone.
"Melvin, before we begin...are you absolutely, positively sure this is what you want?"
"Ms. Lenora, I am. I need this and I want it with all my heart and soul. I am tired of being the man that I am. I've tried to change but nothing worked for me. Please help me."
"As you wish." Ms Lenora replies, as she walks over to a large shelf. She grabs a green bottle from the case and takes it to her desk. She pulls out the cork and drops a small yellow pellet into the bottle. Immediately the bottle begins to glow a bright green. Lenora stretches her arms out and begins to chant, "cora noctum ki dizar, ufum keena bellidar." Melvin watches in amazement as pale green smoke rises from the bottle. Soon the smoke dissipates and the glowing subsides. Ms Lenora replaces the cork and waves Melvin over to the desk.
"Melvin, this is a potent potion, take one teaspoon every morning after breakfast and soon you will be the person you've always dreamed of being." Lenora replies handing the bottle to Melvin.
"That's it?...Uh that's all I have to do?" Asks Melvin looking at the bottle.
"That is all...but there are a few rules you must follow while taking this potion."
"What rules? What do you mean?"
"First the potion must be taken in the morning..."
"Errr..take it in the morning...morning..." The crow sings.
"Secondly, you must take it after you eat breakfast..."
"Errr...in the morning after you eat..." Echoes the crow.
"And finally the most important rule of them all, never ever under any circumstances should you take more than the dosage I prescribed."
"Errr...take it in the morning after you eat, but only a teaspoon so don't you cheat." Rhymes the crow.
"Do you understand Melvin? Follow these simple rules and soon you will be a brand new Melvin Shoemacker."
"Let me get this straight, I must take the potion in the morning after breakfast, but only a teaspoon, no more...no less."
"That is correct."
"Sounds easy, are you sure it will work?" Melvin asks questioningly.
"Oh yes...it definitely will." Ms.Lenora replies a huge smile on her face.
A week passed, and then two; Melvin took his potion faithfully, but still no physical change. However, since he's been taking the potion he has felt better and better each day. On Monday morning of the third week, Melvin got up from bed and yawned his way into the bathroom. He looked into the mirror and almost passed out. He smiled and began to dance around. It was working. He posed in front of the mirror and noticed muscles forming on his arms and stomach. He took off his black rimmed glasses and studied his face. He looked handsome, his face was clear and fuller; more importantly, his eyesight seemed corrected. He didn't need those ugly glasses anymore. He threw the glasses to the floor and laughed. Each passing day Melvin noticed subtle changes, all for the better. He went shopping and bought new clothes and treated himself to a new haircut. As the days rolled on, the changes became more evident; like a withered balloon pumped with air, Melvin filled out and was no longer a skinny nerd. The women of the office took notice and would flock around his desk hoping for a date. Melvin just smiled and teased them, except for Cindy. He always had a thing for Cindy, back when he was a nerd, but he never acted on his feelings. Cindy was always friendly towards him, but lately she stayed away and paid him no mind. He really liked her, but couldn't understand her cold shoulder so he decided to confront her. "Cindy, I was just wondering if you had a minute to talk."
"I'm pretty busy Melvin..." She replied.
"It will only take a second..."
"Okay just a second. I have a lot of work to do."
"Cindy I don't understand, what's your problem?"
"Excuse me Melvin, I don't have a problem, you do!"
"What do you mean?" Melvin answered puzzled.
"Ah forget it Melvin, just leave me alone."
"Cindy, I've always liked you..."
"That's the problem! I've always liked you too, before you changed. I remember when you were the sweetest, kindest man. Now you're just another conceited muscle brain. Where did the Melvin I know go?"
Melvin wanted to cry, he always had a thing for Cindy but he kept it to himself. If he had only known...but suddenly his pride took over and became angry. "Let me tell you Cindy, the old Melvin was a weak lonely man." Cindy just looked up at him with tears in his eyes and answered, "No you're wrong, now all I see is a lonely weak man." Cindy turned away from him and stormed off to her office. Melvin stood paralyzed and for a split second he felt like his old self, a nobody, a weak frail man, but the feeling quickly vanished when Donna sauntered up to him and invited him for dinner.
Melvin stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. He smiled at himself and admired his body. Thoughts of Cindy crept into his mind, but he quickly dismissed them and focused on his date with Donna. Donna was a pretty woman and even though she was known as the office tramp, it didn't bother him. He was about to get lucky and that was all that mattered. He excitedly dressed knowing it was going to be a terrific night.
Melvin picked Donna up and he could see she wasn't wearing a bra. He kissed her as she entered his car and gave her a rose he picked up at a street vendor. She smelled the flower and giggled.
"So where do you want to eat?" Asked Melvin.
"I don't care Mel..." She giggled again.
"I thought dinner would be nice, aren't you hungry?"
"I'm only hungry for one thing right now..." She whispered nibbling on his ear. Needless to say they decided to skip dinner and head to Melvin's place; neither was disappointed by this arrangement.
The sun glistened through the window and engulfed the sleeping couple. Articles of clothing were strewn about the room in excited disarray. Melvin restlessly awoke by the blinding sun. He looked at his alarm clock and jumped out of bed.
"Jesus Christ it's nine o'clock! Donna get up!" Melvin shook the woman in his bed and she yawned. "Donna we have to move, it's nine...I can't afford to take another day off!"
"Arghhh...let me sleep, please." She yawned turning over on her side.
"Do what you want, I've got to go." Melvin quickly showered and got dressed as Donna lay sleeping in his bed. He glanced at her with regret and grabbed his coat and headed for the door. Suddenly he remembered the potion. He grabbed the bottle and downed the remaining liquid. As Melvin walked out of his apartment he remembered Ms. Lenora's rules..."First it must be taken in the morning, second it must be taken after breakfast, and most importantly only the prescribed dosage, no more no less." As Melvin raced to work he thought to himself, "Well I got one right...what could possibly happen?"
The convulsions started immediately after he had his lunch. After he finished his Big Mac and fries his body began to jerk and twist uncontrollably. He made it back to his office and ran into the bathroom. He looked into the mirror and his face was beet red and his body tingled all over. He splashed water on his face and stared in the mirror. "Oh God, I feel like shit, what was in that damn burger." Suddenly a sharp pain pierced his abdomen. Melvin fell to the floor holding his stomach. As he convulsed on the bathroom floor, he let out a huge belch, slowly the pain subsided. Melvin grabbed onto the sink and hoisted himself up. Sweat poured down his face, but there was no more pain. Slowly he straightened himself out and looked back into the mirror. He was flushed and still queasy, but he managed to pull himself together. He stepped out of the bathroom and almost ran into Cindy. "Hey watch it...Melvin are you feeling okay?" Asked Cindy.
"Yeah I'm okay...just think I had a bad burger. Cindy look I'm..."
"Well excuse me, I have work to do." She said as concern was replaced by indifference on her face.
Melvin just stood there, as the woman who meant a great deal to him walked away.
The afternoon seemed to drag on forever. Melvin kept watching the clock praying for it to move faster. Finally work was over and he packed up his things and left. As he stood outside his apartment door, he remembered Donna and hoped he let herself out and was not still in there. He called her name as he walked into the apartment, but there was no answer. He went directly to his bedroom and found a note on his bed:
MELVIN-LAST NIGHT WAS AMAZING! CALL ME,
DONNA
Melvin laughed and crumpled the paper and threw it in the garbage. He walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. He grabbed a beer and noticed the left-over chicken from the other night. He took a leg and sat in his recliner and switched on the television. He devoured the leg in seconds and downed the beer. His stomach rumbled and gurgled calling for more food. He didn't want to give in to his hunger, not sure if his stomach was still queasy, but it growled wanting more food. He opened the refrigerator and took out the rest of the left-over chicken, within minutes the plate was empty. He opened a box of cookies and ate them in one sitting along with a quart of milk, but still his hunger couldn't be quenched. He tried to stop eating but couldn't. He ate and ate, anything and everything; but still he couldn't control his appetite. Suddenly he felt his body expand, his pants tightened and he popped the buttons on his shirt. He was a man obsessed, all that mattered to him was what he was going to eat next. He called for pizza, then Chinese food, hour after hour he sat and ate. The nights came and went, but Melvin did not sleep. He continued to devour every edible thing that was in his house, and when there was nothing left he called for more take out. No thoughts but food entered his mind. The phone rang, but he could not answer it he was too busy feeding his face.
Cindy put down the phone. She was worried about Melvin, he didn't look good four days ago and he hasn't been back to work since. She hoped he was alright, because she had a strange feeling something was wrong. She pushed the thought out of her head, deciding he was using his vacation time and having fun. She always liked Melvin, but then he changed. She wishes the old Melvin would resurface, then she would go out with him, but she new it would never happen. He turned into a conceited, arrogant muscle monster, and she cannot stomach that type of man.
ONE WEEK LATER
Cindy walked slowly up the staircase. A strange odor filled the hallway. She stopped on the first landing and walked to the door. She knocked and called out but there was no answer. She turned the knob and the door clicked open. She took a deep breathe and pushed the door open. A wave of odors crashed against her, she gagged and thought she would vomit, but she held it down. Garbage was everywhere, mounds of pizza boxes, wrappers and food cartons, littered the tiny apartment. "Hello?...Melvin are you here?" She called out holding her nose. She pushed through the garbage , then stopped in her tracks. A weird rustling noise came from behind the door to the right. She walked to the door, stopped and listened. A grotesque squishing noise came from within the room. She opened the door and slowly walked in. The room was dark, her eyes followed where the noise was coming from and she thought she saw something moving in the back of the room. She moved her hand up to the wall in search of a light switch; with the light came her screams. Cindy screamed again at the mass of blubber and flesh that sat in a corner chomping on what appeared to be a human leg. A headless torso laid at the things feet, a Domino's Pizza cap sat nearby. The thing that was Melvin looked up at Cindy, it tossed the leg to the floor and extended its grubby arms and sausage like fingers towards her. Suddenly it began to shake like a bowl of jello, and began its gelatinous way towards Cindy. She screamed again as it rippled and wriggled its way across the floor. She screamed again, but it didn't stop. It sloshed and slid across the floor leaving a trail of greasy lard behind it. Cindy turned to run but tripped over all the garbage. It inched its way closer and closer, Cindy pushed her self against the wall, paralyzed with fear. The mass of greasy blubber came at her inching itself like a huge slug. Suddenly it stopped. Its huge eyes bulged and its mouth dropped. She looked up at the creature and for an instant it looked familiar. "Oh Melvin please." She cried staring into the things eyes. The things mouth opened wider and it slid closer. "Please Melvin...I...I loved you." Cindy cried. The creature rumbled and shook like a jello mold in an earthquake. The layers of fat rippled and bounced. A low deep moan came from the creature as it vibrated and convulsed. Cindy stood and inched her way to the door. The moan grew louder as the thing shook uncontrollably. Cindy placed her hand over her ears as she watched the creature in horror. The thing that was Melvin blurted out the woman's name in a deep, hoarse moan. At that moment the convulsions stopped, and the creature exploded. Blubber and flesh flew in every direction, sticking to the walls and ceiling. Cindy screamed uncontrollably. as blood spurted from the remaining lump of lifeless flesh. She ran out of the apartment hysterical, knowing she would never see Melvin again.
There is a moral to this story, but I think you can figure it out for yourself. Now go to sleep my friends and be good, cause if your not....(Insert evil laugh)
THE END
Monday, August 20, 2012
MY SECOND BOOK: LOVER FORSAKEN
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Love and Heartache
As a gay man, love has been elusive to me. I've fallen three times, and although there were good times I always ended up hurt. Some will say, "...that's life, you learn from your mistakes," but I'm tired of learning. I want to love and be loved. It's always funny how you think the one person that supposedly loves you, will not hurt you, but it my cases I've been the one hurt. Sometimes I wonder if it's my fault, that I give too much of myself and trust in the wrong people. But that's just who I am, I don't throw around the word "love" unless I mean it. I can only wish I could meet someone that feels the same way I do about what it means to love.
This post has to do with more poetry, some about love and some about heartache and betrayal. I hope you enjoy and please give a minute to leave some feedback.
COMPOSITION OF LOVE by Thomas Ventrelli
The page of the music stares at me
In it I see
Like a reflection
Myself, my life and my love...you
I sit at the piano and play
The tune carries me to the past...
My thoughts-the notes
The staff-my life
And you-a rest
The instrument we play is love.
The conductor-fate
I play...
We play...
Together our bodies sing
Like a chorus
Young...
Vibrant...
Alive...
Suddenly...it stopped
We stopped,
I stopped.
I reach out to take hold of the music...
And find myself lying in bed, the tune fading.
I race to the piano, sit and play
Composing my love for you.
WITHIN by Thomas Ventrelli
Within each heart, lies a yearning soul
Searching for another to have and to hold
Within each beat, lies a song to be sung
Waiting for a duet to sing as one
Within each touch, lies the sweetest caress
Longing for happiness in exquisite tenderness
Within each kiss, lies a passion so bright
Engulfing each moment in sensual delight
Within each stare, lies a mirror of the past
Reflecting joy and sorrow of loves that didn't last
Within each smile, lies a heart that is true
Finally finding the "one" who becomes a part of you
Within this man, who was delivered by fate
I have found...a friend, a lover... my soul-mate.
EMOTIONAL TERRORIST by Thomas Ventrelli
He's an emotional terrorist
Waging his own kind of war
With words of mass destruction
He'll leave your heart on the floor
He's a fatalist, a masochist
A wolf in sheep's clothes
He preys on lonely hearts
Seduction is what he knows
Mesmerized by his smile
Attracted to his style
He'll possess your heart and soul
Watch out! The emotional terrorist is on patrol.
He's an emotional terrorist
Conning his way into your heart
With words of mass destruction
He'll tear your soul apart
He's charismatic, melodramatic
A master of disguise
He's everything you wished for
But his love is just all lies
Mesmerized by his smile
Attracted to his style
He'll take your heart and soul
Watch out! The emotional terrorist is on patrol.
He's an emotional terrorist
Waging his own kind of war
With words of mass destruction
He'll leave your heart on the floor
Don't be his next victim
He takes no prisoners
Don't be his next victim
He takes no prisoners.
HEART ON A SLEEVE by Thomas Ventrelli
We've known each other for a while now baby
And you know I care for you
But there's this feeling inside
That I just can't hide
And I think you feel it too
It's not the way that you love me
Or the way we embrace
It's a feeling of insecurity
When I look into your face
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
I know you wouldn't hurt me
Or cause me any pain
But a broken heart is hard to mend
And it's never quite the same
So if you think you can love me
I'll reach out my hand
But if your just not sure
Then let me tell you again
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
I know things don't last forever
Like the love two people share
But you know, it's worse in the end
When one is unaware
So, if the road we are travelling
Is the same I traveled before
Maybe we could change our path
If I tell you just once more
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
This post has to do with more poetry, some about love and some about heartache and betrayal. I hope you enjoy and please give a minute to leave some feedback.
COMPOSITION OF LOVE by Thomas Ventrelli
The page of the music stares at me
In it I see
Like a reflection
Myself, my life and my love...you
I sit at the piano and playThe tune carries me to the past...
My thoughts-the notes
The staff-my life
And you-a rest
The instrument we play is love.
The conductor-fate
I play...
We play...
Together our bodies sing
Like a chorus
Young...
Vibrant...
Alive...
Suddenly...it stopped
We stopped,
I stopped.
I reach out to take hold of the music...
And find myself lying in bed, the tune fading.
I race to the piano, sit and play
Composing my love for you.
WITHIN by Thomas Ventrelli
Within each heart, lies a yearning soul
Searching for another to have and to hold
Within each beat, lies a song to be sung
Waiting for a duet to sing as one
Within each touch, lies the sweetest caress
Longing for happiness in exquisite tenderness
Within each kiss, lies a passion so bright
Engulfing each moment in sensual delight
Within each stare, lies a mirror of the past
Reflecting joy and sorrow of loves that didn't last
Within each smile, lies a heart that is true
Finally finding the "one" who becomes a part of you
Within this man, who was delivered by fate
I have found...a friend, a lover... my soul-mate.
EMOTIONAL TERRORIST by Thomas Ventrelli
He's an emotional terrorist
Waging his own kind of war
With words of mass destruction
He'll leave your heart on the floor
He's a fatalist, a masochist
A wolf in sheep's clothesHe preys on lonely hearts
Seduction is what he knows
Mesmerized by his smile
Attracted to his style
He'll possess your heart and soul
Watch out! The emotional terrorist is on patrol.
He's an emotional terrorist
Conning his way into your heart
With words of mass destruction
He'll tear your soul apart
He's charismatic, melodramatic
A master of disguise
He's everything you wished for
But his love is just all lies
Mesmerized by his smile
Attracted to his style
He'll take your heart and soul
Watch out! The emotional terrorist is on patrol.
He's an emotional terrorist
Waging his own kind of war
With words of mass destruction
He'll leave your heart on the floor
Don't be his next victim
He takes no prisoners
Don't be his next victim
He takes no prisoners.
HEART ON A SLEEVE by Thomas Ventrelli
We've known each other for a while now baby
And you know I care for you
But there's this feeling inside
That I just can't hide
And I think you feel it too
It's not the way that you love me
Or the way we embrace
It's a feeling of insecurity
When I look into your face
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
I know you wouldn't hurt me
Or cause me any pain
But a broken heart is hard to mend
And it's never quite the same
So if you think you can love me
I'll reach out my hand
But if your just not sure
Then let me tell you again
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
I know things don't last forever
Like the love two people share
But you know, it's worse in the end
When one is unaware
So, if the road we are travelling
Is the same I traveled before
Maybe we could change our path
If I tell you just once more
Don't let me wear my heart on a sleeve
Don't tell me promises you can't keep
Don't make me think what I want to believe
'Cause a heart on a sleeve
Is just a broken heart in the end.
Friday, August 17, 2012
Living in Oblivion 2
Growing up as a young adult in the late 70's and 80's was tough. I had lots of friends, but the world was changing and being thin and glamorous was in, unfortunately I was always a big boy. As I look back at how stupid I was, it pains me to this day. I never said "no" to anybody for fear of being rejected. I yearned to be like everyone else. I took the roll as a follower, and did whatever my peers wanted. I had low self-esteem and I was confused about my sexuality which I kept to myself. All these pressures take a toll on a young mind and not loving yourself can get you into dire situations, and hanging out with the wrong crowd...well you know what that can lead to.
HELL TIMES TWO
by
Thomas Ventrelli
THE DECENT:
My Savior! My Savior!
Come deliver me
Take me away of what I chose to be
He gave me lies, but why couldn't I see?
He stole my soul, and used me miserably
He taught me sin, in that Hell's Kitchen
Some white powder is all you need
Oh, there it goes another nose bleed
Promises broken, goals unattended
Downward I fall....Hell descended.
BACK INTO HELL:
Deja vu has taken hold of me
Wasn't I here before?
Why couldn't I see?
The demons are lurking
Just around the bend
Waiting to take my soul...
Can this be happening again?
Like Dante's Inferno and the Circles of Sin
Monotony occurs day out, day in
And the Devil, he's waiting, laughing to the bank
And we his Golems, just us to thank
The thought disappears, along with my dreams
It's too late now, I can't be redeemed
Why didn't I learn, now it's just like before
I shouldn't have answered the knock...
When the Devil was back at my door.
SAVE ME
by
Thomas Ventrelli
Lost in Oblivion
Caressed by the dark
Calling your name
Calling your heart
But no answer
You don't hear my call
Drugged by emotions
I stumble and fall
You are not there to catch me
You are not there at all
Alone...(in the night)
Alone...(in my soul)
I don't want to be alone
I want to be whole
Save me
Save me
Grab my hand
Pull me up
Up to you
Don't let me fall
Hold tight
Hold true
Save me, save me
Save me from you
Wandering in Hell
Touched by the night
Wanting so hard
Wanting the light
But you're not here
Not here at all
Drugged by the evil
I stumble and fall
You are not here to catch me
You are not here at all
Alone...(in the dark)
Alone...(in my soul)
Now I know...
I will never be whole
HELL TIMES TWO
by
Thomas Ventrelli
THE DECENT:
My Savior! My Savior!
Come deliver me
Take me away of what I chose to be
He gave me lies, but why couldn't I see?
He stole my soul, and used me miserably
He taught me sin, in that Hell's Kitchen
Some white powder is all you need
Oh, there it goes another nose bleed
Promises broken, goals unattended
Downward I fall....Hell descended.
BACK INTO HELL:
Deja vu has taken hold of me
Wasn't I here before?
Why couldn't I see?
The demons are lurking
Just around the bend
Waiting to take my soul...
Can this be happening again?
Like Dante's Inferno and the Circles of Sin
Monotony occurs day out, day in
And the Devil, he's waiting, laughing to the bank
And we his Golems, just us to thank
The thought disappears, along with my dreams
It's too late now, I can't be redeemed
Why didn't I learn, now it's just like before
I shouldn't have answered the knock...
When the Devil was back at my door.
SAVE ME
by
Thomas Ventrelli
Lost in Oblivion
Caressed by the dark
Calling your name
Calling your heart
But no answer
You don't hear my call
Drugged by emotionsI stumble and fall
You are not there to catch me
You are not there at all
Alone...(in the night)
Alone...(in my soul)
I don't want to be alone
I want to be whole
Save me
Save me
Grab my hand
Pull me up
Up to you
Don't let me fall
Hold tight
Hold true
Save me, save me
Save me from you
Wandering in Hell
Touched by the night
Wanting so hard
Wanting the light
But you're not here
Not here at all
Drugged by the evil
I stumble and fall
You are not here to catch me
You are not here at all
Alone...(in the dark)
Alone...(in my soul)
Now I know...
I will never be whole
Living in Oblivion
Growing up in the 70's and 80's was different than today. It was an era of discos and new wave, partying and having fun. There were no cell phones or wifi and using condoms were for protection against pregnancy, until the epidemic called AIDS burst onto the scene. As a wannabe writer, I wanted to get the message out there...our world was changed and people had to know the consequences of their actions. I originally started writing this as a song...but isn't song lyrics poetry set to music? I hope you enjoy my little work, that carries a big message.
JUST A LITTLE SONG ABOUT... by Thomas Ventrelli
Sue sits by the window, with tears in her eyes
Thinking of the past and of love based on lies
She thinks of her Bobby and the life that "could have been"
If only sweet Bobby didn't commit the ultimate sin...
Just a little song
About Bobby and Sue
Childhood sweethearts
With nothing left to do
Straight out of High
They exchanged their vows
Living for love
Living for now
One year in...a baby on the way
Two years in...just another day
Three more years and the family grew
It's now ten years but nobody knew
You see, Bobby's been cheating with a girl named Jan
She gives Bobby what only she can
But poor Bobby never knew what she had
And gave it to him, it's so, so sad
Now before Bobby, Sue was with Ken
A real macho guy who also liked men
He partied hard and partied high
Looking for diamonds in the sky
When Ken was high, he spent time with Bill
Little did he know they'd be reading his will
Now Bill was a student at NYU
Drama his forte, but tuition was due
So Bill unaware, decided to hustle
And that's how he met sweet Mr. Russel
Now good ol' Russ was an intravenous drug user
Always feeling inadequate, a natural born loser
He shared needles with a girl named Anne
Now just to recap, let's do this again
Bobby got it from Jan, who got it from Ken
Ken got it from Bill, who got it from Russel
Good ol' Russ was infected by Anne
That's where we stopped
But not where it began
We can go on and on, but the song remains
Just different people, with different names
Now remember poor Sue sitting in her chair
Plagued by the memories of Bobby's affair
Bobby's been dead for almost a year
She tries to convince herself there's nothing to fear
But deep down inside, she knows what is true
She's been losing weight, and always tired too
She peers out the window into the darkening sky
Praying to God and asking Him "Why"?
Just a little song about...
JUST A LITTLE SONG ABOUT... by Thomas Ventrelli
Sue sits by the window, with tears in her eyes
Thinking of the past and of love based on lies
She thinks of her Bobby and the life that "could have been"
If only sweet Bobby didn't commit the ultimate sin...
Just a little song
About Bobby and Sue
Childhood sweethearts
With nothing left to do
Straight out of High
They exchanged their vows
Living for love
Living for now
One year in...a baby on the way
Two years in...just another day
Three more years and the family grew
It's now ten years but nobody knew
You see, Bobby's been cheating with a girl named Jan
She gives Bobby what only she can
But poor Bobby never knew what she had
And gave it to him, it's so, so sad
Now before Bobby, Sue was with Ken
A real macho guy who also liked men
He partied hard and partied high
Looking for diamonds in the sky
When Ken was high, he spent time with Bill
Little did he know they'd be reading his will
Now Bill was a student at NYU
Drama his forte, but tuition was due
So Bill unaware, decided to hustle
And that's how he met sweet Mr. Russel
Now good ol' Russ was an intravenous drug user
Always feeling inadequate, a natural born loser
He shared needles with a girl named Anne
Now just to recap, let's do this again
Bobby got it from Jan, who got it from Ken
Ken got it from Bill, who got it from Russel
Good ol' Russ was infected by Anne
That's where we stopped
But not where it began
We can go on and on, but the song remains
Just different people, with different names
Now remember poor Sue sitting in her chair
Plagued by the memories of Bobby's affair
Bobby's been dead for almost a year
She tries to convince herself there's nothing to fear
But deep down inside, she knows what is true
She's been losing weight, and always tired too
She peers out the window into the darkening sky
Praying to God and asking Him "Why"?
Just a little song about...
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Poetry Time
I love poetry and in college I took a few writing courses, which included The Art of Poetry. Needless to say, my Professor hated my work. You see, I always believed poetry as a rhyming sing-songy verse...but he liked abstract writing with no rhyming. I tried, and tried and did manage to adhere to his wishes, but I still favor my rhyming works better....You be the judge...lol
CLEAR TERRESTRIALS by Thomas Ventrelli
The core of illuminating auras
The membranes and quiet tempers
Automatic questions of days attended
The voices of many Premiers
The world regards a single target
The soldiers parade despairingly
The other new invention of nature
Encountering the old
An eye for an eye
Passing the curious spectators
Sure the visitors are quiet
For a change
But they are only Clear Terrestrials
GUILTY by Thomas Ventrelli
Innocence was murdered
She was stabbed, gagged, raped
and mutilated
Invaded by passion
Selfishly destroyed by lust
There were two witnesses
A male
A female
But neither came forward
They came within
THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS by Thomas Ventrelli
I sit and feel the depth of it,
the many curves call to me,
then splash forth...
unto a new plane of thought.
The shattered particles cloud my misty eyes,
sending false prophecy and glass promises.
Creating a new dawn...
For searching hearts,
and crimson dreams,
star-crossed lovers
and moonlit beams.
Is this life that carries on?
Or is it fate I stumbled upon?
WHISPERS IN THE NIGHT by Thomas Ventrelli
Lying here with you
In the stillness of the night
I wanting you
You wanting me
The feeling seems so right
Holding you close
Keeping you warm
The calm before the storm
The calm before the storm
Entwined in loves embrace
Our bodies merge as one
I look into your face
My heart begins to run
You whisper in my ear
The pressure starts to build
The words I want to hear
Your love for me fulfilled
Then suddenly...
The dark is turned to light
With your whispers in the night
My love for you explodes
And I just lose control
I want to give so much
I can't resist your touch
I want to make it right
Whispers in the night.
And then we are all done
You stand and walk away
But the darkness seems to hide
What I want to say
Before you turn and leave
The words are set free
The dark is turned to light
With my whispers in the night.
INTO THE LIGHT by Thomas Ventrelli
Can you hear me crying?
Whimpering in the night.
Trying to feel your pain,
Why keep up this fight?
Tears have been falling
And they've taken there toll.
Don't hang on for us
Please let go
Leave from this darkness,
Go into the light
There you'll be safe
We'll be alright.
So, go now...He's waiting
We will meet again
In another time, another place
We'll all be the same.
Your love we will hold,
Close to our hearts.
Your spirit will be with us,
It's time to depart.
So go now...please
Into the light
There's nothing to fear
We'll be alright.
****Well that's it for now, I hope you liked some of my poetry...I bet you can figure out the ones my Professor enjoyed...please leave comments...feedback is always welcomed...till we meet again...ciao.
CLEAR TERRESTRIALS by Thomas Ventrelli
The core of illuminating auras
The membranes and quiet tempers
Automatic questions of days attended
The voices of many Premiers
The world regards a single target
The soldiers parade despairingly
The other new invention of nature
Encountering the old
An eye for an eye
Passing the curious spectators
Sure the visitors are quiet
For a change
But they are only Clear Terrestrials
GUILTY by Thomas Ventrelli
Innocence was murdered
She was stabbed, gagged, raped
and mutilated
Invaded by passion
Selfishly destroyed by lust
There were two witnesses
A male
A female
But neither came forward
They came within
THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS by Thomas Ventrelli
I sit and feel the depth of it,
the many curves call to me,
then splash forth...
unto a new plane of thought.
The shattered particles cloud my misty eyes,
sending false prophecy and glass promises.
Creating a new dawn...
For searching hearts,
and crimson dreams,
star-crossed lovers
and moonlit beams.
Is this life that carries on?
Or is it fate I stumbled upon?
WHISPERS IN THE NIGHT by Thomas Ventrelli
Lying here with you
In the stillness of the night
I wanting you
You wanting me
The feeling seems so right
Holding you close
Keeping you warm
The calm before the storm
The calm before the storm
Entwined in loves embrace
Our bodies merge as one
I look into your face
My heart begins to run
You whisper in my ear
The pressure starts to build
The words I want to hear
Your love for me fulfilled
Then suddenly...
The dark is turned to light
With your whispers in the night
My love for you explodes
And I just lose control
I want to give so much
I can't resist your touch
I want to make it right
Whispers in the night.
And then we are all done
You stand and walk away
But the darkness seems to hide
What I want to say
Before you turn and leave
The words are set free
The dark is turned to light
With my whispers in the night.
INTO THE LIGHT by Thomas Ventrelli
Can you hear me crying?
Whimpering in the night.
Trying to feel your pain,
Why keep up this fight?
Tears have been falling
And they've taken there toll.
Don't hang on for us
Please let go
Leave from this darkness,
Go into the light
There you'll be safe
We'll be alright.
So, go now...He's waiting
We will meet again
In another time, another place
We'll all be the same.
Your love we will hold,
Close to our hearts.
Your spirit will be with us,
It's time to depart.
So go now...please
Into the light
There's nothing to fear
We'll be alright.
****Well that's it for now, I hope you liked some of my poetry...I bet you can figure out the ones my Professor enjoyed...please leave comments...feedback is always welcomed...till we meet again...ciao.
My First Book
He runs out of the Hotel Carlyle horrified. The image of Bernadette's head sends nauseated spasms throughout his body. The sound of the fiend's diabolical laughter haunts him every stride. He sobs and cries for his sweet Bernadette. She was an innocent in this hellish game, just like the others before her. He stops, stares up to Heaven and screams. He cannot take anymore of this. Why does fate fate abandon him yet again, only to give him love then brutally take it away? Everyone he loves is taken away from that sadistic beast. He runs faster, pushing himself through the streets of London, blood tears staining the cobblestone pavement. He cannot stop running. If he stops, the sorrow will overwhelm him and he will have to face the truth; that his love kills. The light rain and fog caress his broken heart. He is drunk on suffering, numb and battered. This is too much for one man to take. He laughs at that thought, for he is no man. A man could protect the one he loves. No, he is a monster. He pictures her beautiful face and he cries. Just like the others she was taken away from him. He does not hear the horse drawn carriage as it almost runs him down, the driver cursing him as it passes. He is selfish. He could end this torment and his suffering, but his heart will not let him. The silent heart, that only beats in the presence of his love. Somehow, some way he will fulfill his destiny and love his soul mate. He will wait. He had to wait; all he has is time. He is immortal, he is a vampire. Centuries had come and gone, and his longing for love...his love, only intensifies. So again the cycle continues. He must be patient. Love will come again, it always has. He will feed and sleep. He cannot bear roaming the earth without his love. So he will die, if you can call it that. After all, isn't he dead already? He will go deep in the earth and cease to exist. Just like the times before, he will give himself to Mother Earth. While the world moves forward he remains; until the beacon of love shines down upon him, signaling that his love has returned and walks the earth, then and only then will he awaken.
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